Blog Posts

Grief during the holidays isn’t just about sadness. Sure, there might be tears when a favorite song plays or when you pull out that one ornament. But grief can also look like anger when someone says the wrong thing or a deep ache when everyone else seems so joyful. Sometimes it’s just plain exhaustion from pretending you’re okay when you’re not.

And then there’s the grief we don’t always talk about. The messy, complicated feelings that don’t fit into the neat picture of loss people expect. Maybe you’re mourning someone who isn’t physically gone but emotionally unavailable—a parent who’s still alive but was never really “there” for you. That’s called ambiguous grief, and it’s heavy in a way that’s hard to explain. Or maybe your loss doesn’t feel “valid” enough, like a miscarriage, the loss of a pet, or a dream that didn’t happen. That’s disenfranchised grief, and it often comes with a side of guilt for even feeling the way you do.

The holidays can bring all of this to the surface, magnifying what’s missing or what could have been. You might find yourself smiling through traditions while a part of you feels distant and detached. You might avoid gatherings altogether because the weight of pretending is too much.

But Grief doesn’t follow a timeline and it doesn’t have to look a certain way. You’re allowed to feel joy and sadness in the same breath. You’re allowed to take up space with your grief, even if the world around you feels like it’s shouting, “Be happy!”

If this resonates, know that you don’t have to navigate it alone. Therapy can help you make sense of the layers of grief, find ways to honor your loss, and let go of the pressure to “get over it.” The holidays may never feel the same, but they can still hold moments of peace and connection—even if it looks different than it did before. You deserve that, and we’re here to support you.

Parenting is never easy, but when you’ve experienced childhood trauma, it can feel like navigating a minefield of emotional triggers. You might find yourself reacting in ways that surprise even you—feeling disproportionately angry, shutting down, or becoming hypervigilant about your child’s safety. Your past has shaped you, and when parenting stirs up old wounds, it can feel overwhelming.

One of the hardest parts of parenting after trauma is when your child reminds you of yourself at the age you were hurt. Looking at your child, so innocent and full of trust, can bring a fresh wave of pain. It’s heartbreaking to think about someone hurting a child—or to recognize that you weren’t protected in the way your child deserves to be. These moments can leave you feeling raw, questioning your own emotions and the love you deserved as a child.

For many, this leads to avoidance. Avoidance can look like overcompensating by trying to be the “perfect” parent or distancing yourself emotionally to protect your heart. While this might feel like self-preservation, avoidance can limit your ability to fully connect with your child and create moments of emotional distance.

If you’re hypervigilant, you may find yourself on edge, constantly scanning for danger. This heightened state of anxiety can drain your energy and leave you feeling irritable or exhausted. You’re not just trying to keep your child safe—you’re working overtime to soothe your own inner fears.˝

The good news is that you don’t have to parent in the shadow of your trauma forever. Therapy can help you process these emotions and triggers, unpack the pain of your past, and build tools for more mindful, connected parenting. Together, we can work to heal those old wounds while giving you the support and guidance you need to thrive as both a parent and an individual. You deserve peace—and so does your child.

After giving birth, it’s natural to experience a mix of emotions—joy, exhaustion, and sometimes even sadness. For many new mothers, these mood swings are part of the “baby blues,” a temporary adjustment period in the first two weeks postpartum. The baby blues often involve mild mood changes, tearfulness, and feelings of overwhelm, but they typically ease on their own. Postpartum Depression (PPD) is different. Affecting roughly 1 in 8 mothers, PPD lasts longer and has more intense symptoms than the baby blues. PPD may cause deep feelings of sadness, disconnection, or irritability. Many mothers also struggle with fatigue that isn’t relieved by sleep, difficulty concentrating, or feeling as though they’re failing as a parent. These feelings can impact daily life, making it hard to bond with your baby, communicate with loved ones, or focus on work and personal responsibilities. You may find yourself avoiding friends and family or feeling constant guilt that makes it difficult to enjoy time with your baby.

It’s important to remember that PPD is not your fault. Various factors, including a personal or family history of depression or anxiety, limited support, a traumatic birth experience, and hormonal changes, can all increase the risk of PPD. The good news is that with help, PPD is manageable. Therapy, particularly with a perinatal-trained therapist, can be transformative in navigating these challenges. At Nest Counseling, we specialize in supporting new mothers through these transitions, offering a safe space to address these experiences. If you’re struggling, reach out—healing is possible, and you don’t have to face this journey alone.

As therapists, we know the value of mental health care—but when it comes to seeking help ourselves, shame can creep in. Many of us feel we should be able to manage our struggles on our own, and admitting we need support can trigger feelings of failure. But therapists are human, too. We face our own challenges, including burnout, vicarious trauma, stress, and unresolved childhood issues. One of the hardest parts of stepping into therapy as a therapist is taking off our “therapist hat” and allowing ourselves to be the client. We may struggle to stop analyzing the process and simply be present with our own pain. Add to that the difficulty of finding a therapist outside our professional network, and it’s no wonder many therapists hesitate to get the help they deserve. But just like our clients, we need a safe space to process our emotions and decompress from the weight of the work we do. Therapy for therapists isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a radical act of self-care. Let’s normalize getting the help we need, because we’re all worthy of support.

The truth is, therapists are often at higher risk for mental health struggles due to the nature of our work. We hold space for others’ pain, and that can lead to compassion fatigue, exhaustion, and even personal crises. Seeking therapy gives us a chance to refill our own cups, heal our own wounds, and prevent the burnout that is so prevalent in our field. You deserve care and support- NOT so that you can be better at helping others, but because YOU are a person and you deserve it. At Nest Counseling, we focus on helping the helpers and that includes therapy for therapists. Email us if you want to see if we can be a good fit.

Experiencing sexual assault is a deeply painful and traumatic event. It can affect your body, mind, and emotions in ways you might not even realize. Trauma from assault can show up in many forms—nightmares, anxiety, difficulty trusting others, or even physical symptoms like chronic pain or tension. Shame often accompanies this trauma, and reaching out for help can feel overwhelming. But you don’t have to go through it alone.

At Nest Counseling, we are trained in trauma-informed care and specialize in helping survivors of sexual assault. We use approaches like somatic therapy and EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) to gently guide you through the healing process. Somatic therapy helps you reconnect with your body, releasing the trauma that gets stored in it, while EMDR can allow you to process traumatic memories without needing to recount every detail. This can be especially helpful if revisiting those moments feels too difficult.

We know that accessing therapy can feel like another hurdle, which is why Pennsylvania’s Victims Compensation Assistance Program is available to help cover up to $5,000 for therapy ($10,000 if the crime occurred when you were a child). Importantly, you don’t have to have reported the assault to the police to qualify for this support, but the crime must have occurred in Pennsylvania.

Therapy can be a safe space to process what happened at your own pace. Whether you’re dealing with flashbacks, shame, or numbness, we’re here to help you feel heard and supported. Our team is compassionate, experienced, and focused on helping you heal.

If you decide to begin counseling, you may start to feel more connected to yourself and your body, find relief from overwhelming emotions, and begin to reclaim your sense of safety and control. Healing is possible, and taking that first step can lead to profound positive change.

You are not alone, and when you’re ready, we’re here to support you. Reach out today to begin your journey toward healing.

Birth is supposed to be one of the most transformative moments of your life—but what if it didn’t go the way you hoped? What if you’re left feeling shaken, scared, or haunted by what happened? This is the reality of birth trauma, and you’re far from alone. Studies show that up to 45% of women report their birth as traumatic, and 1 in 3 experience some form of PTSD symptoms after childbirth. That’s a huge number of parents out there quietly carrying the weight of a birth that didn’t go as planned, feeling like they should just “move on” when it’s anything but simple. If that’s you, please know that your feelings are real, valid, and worth talking about.

What is birth trauma?

Birth trauma isn’t just about what happened during your delivery—it’s about how it left you feeling. It might have been a sudden emergency, a loss of control, feeling dismissed by your care team, or pain that felt out of control. Birth trauma can look like tears that come without warning, panic at the thought of another birth, or feeling like your body betrayed you. If your birth experience left you feeling more than just disappointed, if it feels like a wound that hasn’t healed, you might be dealing with birth trauma. And it’s not just in your head—it’s a real psychological impact that can affect your day-to-day life,

Signs of Birth Trauma and Postpartum PTSD

Birth trauma can show up in many ways. You might notice:

• Recurrent thoughts or nightmares about the birth
• Flashbacks or feeling like you’re reliving the experience
• Hypervigilance, especially around your baby’s health or safety
• Avoidance of reminders like hospitals, birth stories, or even your own medical records
• Emotional numbness or feeling disconnected from your baby or yourself
• Intense feelings of guilt, shame, or anger over how things went

If any of this hits home, you’re not alone—and you’re not overreacting.

How EMDR Can Help You Heal from Birth Trauma

One of the most effective therapies for birth trauma is EMDR, or Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. EMDR isn’t your typical talk therapy. It’s a powerful approach that helps your brain process and heal from trauma in a way that doesn’t require you to constantly relive the painful details.

Here’s how EMDR can help you heal:

• Processing Traumatic Memories: EMDR helps your brain reprocess traumatic memories so they feel less raw, painful, and overwhelming. You don’t have to go through every gory detail; EMDR works by guiding your brain to naturally heal and file those memories away in a way that feels more manageable.
• Reducing Triggers and Flashbacks: If you’ve been avoiding certain places, people, or even conversations about birth because they bring you right back to that moment, EMDR can help desensitize those triggers, making it easier to navigate your everyday life without the constant fear of being pulled back into the trauma.
• Reconnecting with Your Body: After birth trauma, it’s common to feel disconnected or distrustful of your own body. EMDR helps you rebuild that trust by processing the experience in a way that brings compassion and understanding back into the picture.
• Reclaiming Your Birth Story: Trauma often leaves us feeling powerless. EMDR can help you reframe your birth story, giving you back a sense of control and empowerment over what happened. It’s not about forgetting—it’s about finding a way to move forward without the weight of those memories pulling you down.
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